I have frustrated a lot of people by saying the big fat "NO" word lately. I am not good at saying no.
I am a people pleaser. I want people to like me, be pleased with me and be the one to "get it done" for them.
Having a baby and a large family do one thing very well - force me to ask God where He wants me - it becomes very apparent when I am out of balance.
What that looks like right now is slllllllllowing waaaaaay dowwwwwn.
So out comes the big NO card.
Ouch, it hurts.
People think I no longer care about _______ [whatever it may be] and that is just not true.
Hubby and I are very active with Redeemer House and other Ug@ndan ministries. We love it. We love those kids. We fully support my MIL and try to be her biggest cheerleaders [and will continue to]. We love many Ug@ndans and are already looking forward to the next time we get to see them [Lord leading and Lord willing (and you bet I am praying for it!)].
But that is not our God.
Our desire is to follow the leading of the Holy Spirit. In what we do and how we do it. Just because it may seem like a good thing to do does not mean that God desires for me to do _______.
Last fall I could not stop thinking about leading a womens trip - heavy, heavy burden. Therefore to my knees I went and cried out to God that it be Him and not me. Over and over He confirmed for me to GO. I believe that is where He desired for me be, and do, at that time in my life. Those were the good works He had prepared for me [Ephesians 2:10].
Right now God has placed a deep desire and burden to focus here at home. On my husband and children. This is not to say that my heart was not always there, I have been a stay at home mom for 12 years. But this is a new deeper burden, new season.
Next year I will be homeschooling the kids. [talk about needing to focus - hello! :)]
I am growing a garden and trying not to kill it this year [which will be a first - will take focus].
Our family is a part of a milking co-op now. I am learning all kinds of new things with having fresh raw milk twice a week. [we love it! and if you want information on raw milk I have spent far too much time in research and can share one of my 10 million websites :)].
God has a reason for this new season too.
I am trusting Him.
My heart is to be Holy Spirit lead.
Lord please help me to keep my eyes on You and what You desire for me to do in this new season. Oh, and thank you for this new season, I am loving it! Amen :)