Thursday, August 18, 2011

No Idea What I Am Doing!

Here I sit, bloodshot eyes thinking .... I have no idea what I am doing.

Here is the subject matter:  Homeschooling.  [or is it - home schooling - see, i do not even know!!!!]

I am all signed up, home-school-room-ready, curriculum [mostly] ordered [hence the bloodshot eyes] and we are full steam ahead.

What am I doing?

Lord, really?  Are you sure this was the plan?  No Mr. Bus next week?  No forced schedule to keep me going - or worse, kinda schedule?

Oh dear.  [or is it Oh Dear with a big D?  I can not remember!]

You see, I have never really been a good teacher (or student, really).

When the kids do not understand something, my first thought is not: get creative and come from another angle.  It is usually to speak louder.  Kinda like someone that does not speak English - I repeat it louder.

The reality is - volume is not the problem.

Oh Dear [or dear].

Is it possible to become a teacher?  Yes, I know I am teaching them everyday.  I get that.  BUT I am not teaching them math, writing, botany, history, how to read a map..... and other things they learn when the get on Mr. Bus and go away.

I teach them: don't hit your brother, here's how you unload the dishwasher, say your prayers, God is good, fold your clothes, clean out the chicken coop, speak up for those that cannot speak for themselves, spur that horse when she does that - you know, the important stuff.

I can handle that stuff.!

But the rest?  I hardly made it through school myself.  Seriously.

I could tell you a lot about my friends and what happened in high school, down to clothing details but academics?  I hardly remember what teachers I had, let alone what they taught.

You see my dilemma.

But, this is not the first, first.

Firsts are hard.  Everything always looks bigger and more scary.

I am sure it will be fine, just fine.


After all, just this morning Ashton was beautifully doing a figure 8 on her horse.  I taught her that.  [we won't mention the crying and yelling that got us to the beautiful part, now will we.]

Happy Homeschooling!

Here we go!


  1. I am laughing really hard right now. I love this. I love you! You are going to be a fantastic teacher!!!! Silly girl!

  2. My sweet and precious sister, how I wish I could be closer to “walk” this with you...because I know you are going to do WONDERFULLY because you love the LORD and HE has an awesome adventure for you and your children. I’m going to tell you the best kept secret of homeschooling your children...this “secret” is going to change everything for you, you are on an amazing adventure to joy...are you ready?
    The “secret” is by educating your children at home you are going to learn with them, enjoy them more than ever, applaud their strengths and encourage their weaknesses as never before.
    My precious sister...don’t be overwhelmed! I am so excited for are going to LOVE IT. PLEASE email me if you need to “work” through anything or call me. I always want to be here for you and your family - DAY OR NIGHT!
    I love ya’ll

  3. Crack me up, crack me up!!!I am laughing my head off and crying all at the same time. Oh, you think this is just the beginning of this, "OH DEAR, I don't know what I am doing!" but from here on out? This is what you will be saying on a daily basis....I do think you will do great at it, and like me, it will stretch you in places you had no idea you needed stretching....oh the joy!

  4. Just remember...if you taught them to walk and use the bathroom you can teach them all the rest and the fun part?....learning with them!!!!!! You're gonna be great!

  5. Oh can I sympathize...not about homeschool, but about change in general. I went through the same things when we decided to take our kids away from their families and friends and move 300 north...and today, I still question if we made the right decision. You have taught me if you put your faith in God and follow what He tells us, then it's all going to work out. Have a wonderful day and keep us posted.

  6. Oh Shauna,

    Yes, it really will be just fine. I love what Shonni said about the "secret." She is right.

    Another secret is that you don't have to transition to teacher. . . you can still be mama. Mama who provides love, time, attention, and great resources and. . . they will learn. they will.

    Charlotte Mason said "Education is an atmosphere, a discipline, a life." The atmosphere of your home - love, laughter, good literature, physically beautiful spaces to run and play and just be. . . the discipline - of chores, obedience, respect, order, family devotions. . . a life - a real life not contrived, not age segregated, not swallowed up with entertainment and media, but a real full life. . .

    that is what you are blessing your children with and it all will lead to a real education.

    Love you!

  7. You will do awesome, because its not you, ITS CHRIST IN YOU!

    That's the neat part :-)

    May HE fill you with all wisdom and understanding as you spend each day, all day teaching your children the things that are IMPORTANT to the Lord.

    Blessings, peace and joy be multiplied to you,

  8. Just so you know...I feel like this EVERY year, and I've been homeschooling for 8 years now...:-) Somehow, it always works out....a big hug to you, you will do great...God is with you! And you will find that it is more amazing and fun and fulfilling feels like right now. :-)

  9. Shauna~
    All I have to say is I'm sooooooo glad to know you are doing this, cause we are planning the same at some point and it's nice to know that there will be SOMEONE close to us that can provide all the answers, since *you'll* already have taken that road! haha. I'm so mean. ;P
    Really though, you are 100% capable and I hope you post EVERY detail so I can learn from the wise!!!
    BTW, what curriculum are you using? Christian, I'm sure... and I've been checking out a few, but haven't decided yet what route to go.......
    Love ya~


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